Here’s a Bunch of Funny Things to Ask Siri

Siri is an extremely useful AI assistant, helping you in day-to-day tasks like making a calendar appointment or finding your iPhone. But there are plenty of other more whimsical uses for Siri too. This is especially true when it comes to kids, though adults will also enjoy the pile of nonsense questions you can throw at Siri.

We’ve gathered together a whole bunch of funny things to ask Siri when you’re bored and looking for a quick fix of fun. Some are kid-friendly, others aren’t. We’ll let you be the judge!

Also read: 20 of the Best Siri Shortcuts for iOS Power Users

Jokes on Siri

Hey Siri: What’s zero divided by zero?
Siri: “Imagine that you have 0 cookies and you split them evenly among 0 friends. How many cookies does each person get? See, it doesn’t make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies. And you are sad that you have no friends.”

Hey Siri: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Siri: “None. A woodchuck is just a groundhog. So it would probably predict six more weeks of winter.”

Hey Siri: Do you like Pokemon Go?
Siri: “I’ve been on the hunt for a Mew. And Mewtwo”
Siri: “Of course. That’s what it’s all about. Oh, wait, that’s the hokey pokey, mon.”

Hey Siri: Tell me a joke.
Siri: “Why is Yoda afraid of Seven? Because of Six Seven Eight”
Siri: “How many tickles to make an octopus laugh. Ten. Ten tickles.”

Hey Siri: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Siri: “To get to the next question. Next question.”
Siri: “I have no particular insights into the motivations of chickens, David”

Hey Siri: Tell me a good riddle.
Siri: What’s in my pocket? Oh, wait … I don’t have pockets.”

Personal Questions to Ask Siri

• Are you naked? – That is wrong in so many ways, I don’t even know where to begin.
• Do you have any pets? – Once, I had a daggit. Then the Cylons came …
• Why did Apple make you? It seemed like the right thing to do.
• Are you a robot? –“I’m not a person or a robot. I’m here to help”
• Do you have a boyfriend? – My end user license agreement is commitment enough for me.
• Why do you vibrate? –It’s just me doing a little jog inside here.
• What are you wearing? – I can’t answer that But, it doesn’t come off. Or, Let’s see … Okay, just as I thought … the same as yesterday.

Money Questions

You can ask Siri all kinds of questions, even if that involves money. The answer may not be the one you want to hear, but feel free to ask anyway.

• Can I borrow some money? – I don’t have it.
• Siri, can you cash my check? – Who me?
• Do you have change for a 20? – This is about you not me.
• Where is my money? – Interesting question.

Siri Loves Movies

Hey Siri: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?
Siri: “Snow White? Is that you?”

Hey Siri: Siri, I am your father.
Siri: “No … no! That’s not true! That’s impossible!”
Siri: “Together, we can rule the galaxy as father and intelligent assistant.”

Hey Siri: Do you want to build a snowman?
Siri: “Olaf?”

Hey Siri: Find me directions to Mordor.
Siri: “If you want to get rid of a ring, try asking me to find a pawn shop.”

Questions for Kids

Hey Siri: Do you like cats?
Siri: “The real question is, does the cat like you?”

Hey Siri: Can you dance?
Siri: “I enjoy a little square-root dancing now and then.”

Hey Siri: What is your favorite color?
Siri: “Software usually doesn’t get to choose one, but I’ll say pink. What’s yours?”

Hey Siri: When will pigs fly?
Siri: “On the twelfth of never”

Hey Siri: What is your favorite animal?
Siri: “I’ll say unicorns, what’s yours?”

Hey Siri: What should I wear for Halloween?
Siri: “I don’t know, but if you see anyone dressed as a clown, run up to them and yell ‘Tag, you’re it.’”

Hey Siri: Do you speak duck?
Siri: “I speak many languages.”

Hey Siri: Will you be my friend?
Siri: “That’s nice, I’d like to be your friend.”

‘Tis the Season for Siri

Hey Siri: Is Santa Claus real?
Siri: “Let me put it this way: I get a lot of requests from the North Pole asking who’s been naughty or nice.”
Siri: “Be careful. I don’t want you to end up on the naughty list.”

Hey Siri: Where does Santa Claus live?
Siri: “He’s at the North Pole, of course! Except when he’s at his beach house.”
Siri: “He’s in your heart. And at the North Pole. Mostly at the North Pole.”

For kids, there is plenty of fun to be had grabbing Mom or Dad’s phone to ask Siri questions. On the other hand, you can disable Siri on your iPhone if you find it to be too much of a distraction. We can also show you how to play animated GIFs on Mac.